He is the boy they write stories about.

Something terrifying has been going on..I think I'm falling in love.

There's this boy you see and I wasn't looking for this and I wasn't expecting this but now, it's everything I've realized I ever wanted.

But unlike my previous experiences, this is different, [he is different].

I used to have this theory that there were different kinds of love but the past few months I've started to wonder if I ever really had love, was in love, or was loved before him. I probably won't do this justice by trying to put into words how it feels but I'm sure going to try.

For the first time in my life I feel that I'm with someone who celebrates parts of me that others didn't understand or didn't like about me. Someone who just doesn't 'tell' me he respects me but 'shows' me and when I'm with him nothing else is as important as being in that moment and not taking advantage of even a second of that time. He is the boy they write stories about.

I'll be the first to admit that I am someone who tries so hard to see the good in others she overlooks the bad and you may very well think 'how could she possibly know this about him after only knowing him a few months' but if you've met him you know that he is every bit of good he appears to be. And honestly, maybe it is a little crazy, and you can doubt me if you wish but I know in my heart that he is someone I will always be proud of, will always respect, and someone who will try his best to be everything I deserve [always].

You can imagine that it is a little bit overwhelming for me to realize what an amazing and [rare] gift I have been given. It's times like these and people like these that make me realize it only takes one person to impact someone else's life [and impact it forever]. I've never been lucky in love and the consequences of loss are not a distant memory and if there ever comes a day when this person isn't a part of my life I know, on that day, my life will be changed forever. [I will be changed forever]. Think it silly if you must but I can only say you have not felt what I've felt, seen what I've seen, or experienced what I've lived. You read, hear, see things about soul mates and fairy-tales and miracles all of the time. What if this is my fairytale? What if for once, I've experienced the exception, not the rule? It is the magnitude of this immense wondering that leaves me terrified. What if it doesn't get better than this? What if I lose the best thing I'd ever have. I've usually been on the opposite end of this and to now be in this position I can only imagine how terrifying it must be or feel.

I've been on my own for a long time (for the most part) and when I was in the worst place in my life I promised myself to rely on me, that I was going to have to stop relying on others, make myself better, and learn how to be happy on my own. I poured so much energy and time into making myself better that I developed habits, tendencies, and became used to a lifestyle where the only person I had to care or think about was myself. I've already made some mistakes with him because of it and unlike past flames, for the first time in my life, I realized that he was more important than those habits. My decisions that I make now effect another person whether it be indirectly or directly and because he means more to me than anyone has I've realized there are things I need to change about myself and my lifestyle to be everything [he deserves]. It's not like I'm giving anything up, it's more like I'm changing myself for the better because finally someone has come along who is worth changing for. That's the biggest thing I want others to remember. When you agree to enter into a relationship, from then on out, your decisions effect another and you need to ask yourself if you are making the right ones. Don't take advantage of the amazing gift you've been given, or lose that gift, all because you didn't take the time to say no to past tendencies and break old habits.

It is my wish that everyone I love be able to experience this feeling. It's like I'm on the verge of one of the biggest adventures of my life, completely blind to the paths I'll travel or the obstacles along the way....but feel an overwhelming sense of peace because this person isn't only a boyfriend or a date...he is a friend.

You can choose the way you love someone. Despite your fear of being hurt, fear of being changed forever, you choose how you love. You can be scared [and it's alright] but you can also love greater and bigger than you ever have at the same time [and never forget that].

"In your presence I fell more in love with the best of myself. That was your gift."-William Cummings

Be with someone who makes you want to be better, someone who makes you want to work to be better, not someone who you want to make better. Be with someone who pushes to bring out your inner beauty and rejoice in it. Always remember what your beautiful heart deserves and if you meet someone who deserves that gift, that you never lose sight of everything they deserve in return.

-He makes me smile-